Love Thyself!

Today I read a blog that was purely a compilation of pictures with descriptions underneath. It was simple, cartooned and brought such a smile to my face and a spring in my step, so I decided to sit down and write a little about that butterfly feeling of happiness.

The old adage saying of “You can’t truly love another until you truly love yourself” is very clichéd, but is actually quite true. Even the mere acceptance of ourselves is crucial for us to possess in order to get closer to another, and allow them to accept us, and ultimately love us.
Yes, we all have doubts in ourselves and want to mask our shortcomings, but do they define who we are? Do we place more attention on them than needed? Do they outweigh our successes and good qualities we have? It is very easy to dwell on the negatives, but is not something we enjoy. Why do we veer away from dwelling on the positives, something we can enjoy? It’s not as if anyone is going to think we are full of ourselves and self-obsessed (which we can imagine others may think of us) as it is in the privacy of our own thoughts.
As much as this is a glass half full piece, it is more for the intention of shifting mindset slightly outside the box.

What we are is what we believe, what we believe is who we are.

We would like to believe that there is the perfect person out there, and they are exactly whom we want to be. Here comes the bad news… No one is perfect; all humans have their own faults and flaws. It is the people who have identified their weaknesses, accepted them, forgave themselves and have worked on improving them (if possible), who we tend to perceive as perfect. It is the people who have discovered their strengths, are proud of them, and allowed them to blossom that we tend to see as an unreachable persona.

It is only human nature that we tend to compare ourselves with others. It is detrimental to ourselves, but we give ourselves a subconscious permission. When a third party compares us with someone else, we tend to take two steps back and begin thinking for others in a negative light as well as focusing on our own shortcomings. Yes, she may have nicer legs than you, but you have amazing eyes and a great sense of humour. Yes, he may have an expensive watch, but you have a beautiful smile and a successful career. True inner happiness will come from focusing on the right things, and what is good about you. If you had the amazing legs or expensive watch, would you want people to be happy for you? Be happy for them, knowing it’s something you would want and want people to be happy for you also. It then should not surprise you when they in turn, desire for a quality you possess.

You can tell yourself one hundred times a day how great you are… but the reality is that this will only convince your brain short-term. You need to follow it through and find out why you are so great and believe it. Once you have self-creditability, you enlist trust in your affirmations and the effectiveness will be outstanding. When you are feeling good and your self-esteem is at a high… stop! Stop and look around. Stop and think why you are feeling that way. Discover what actions, emotions, gestures, things… it could be anything that you can associate with the feeling. If you can identify and charge whatever that may be that helps increase your confidence, esteem or your mood in general, you pass the gates into being self-aware and have the ability to focus on what makes you happy. Be honest, accept it and remember you are helping yourself along with everyone who loves you.

Love does not make the world go around. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

Be brave and let go of the past and fight for the present you deserve. A better future is always yours for the taking!

Samantha K