How do you take criticism?

I tell you what, I have had a fair share of this in my day (said in an old wise voice) and I feel the more I receive, the better I know how to handle it. My dad taught me many things, but there is one thing in particular that I continue to refine each and every day. He told me “Samantha, the quicker you realize that not everyone is like you, the quicker you will achieve true happiness and not allow such disappointment.” I totally understand what he means and agree, however, it is another thing to implement it and completely live it. This is where it took me a little longer than simply understanding what he meant. 

How can we achieve such a state where we do not take in what negative comparisons our eco-system provides? There is no short answer, but a ride of experiences will help provide you the path to its direction. The hardest critique is that which comes off the back of an opinion or observation coming from a good place, with pure intentions. That is the hardest to not only understand, but to swallow and treat accordingly. It almost on the equal playing field of the opinion of another that it is unjust, uncalled for or simply out of spite. Then, do we take it in our stride, fight for what we believe, or join in playing the game of who speaks the last valid point, wins? In my opinion, the decision rests with the topic, gravity of the situation and to the value you place on your opponent. 

At the same time, I do not discount the appreciation I have for the opinion of others. It is just a wonderful balancing act as to how it affects me and what I chose to do with that opinion. I will also admit, I do value the opinion of some more than others, and that is ok. All in all, the most important persons view and opinion is that of my own (as much as my husband might like to challenge me). The cool thing about owning your own thoughts is that it is in your own privacy that you have the ability to chose what to do with them. When was the last time you aligned your values with the opinion you have taken upon from a third party? At the end of the day, should you disagree with a third parties opinion, what is the worst that can happen?

The opinion you value the most (outside your own, of course!) might be your hairdresser, might be the barrister that serves you coffee and advice every morning, might be your husband, mother, father, or even your child; whoever that might be, is your decision, your right and is catered perfectly to your value system. 

Criticism can be a beautiful thing, for others can sometimes provide you with that you cannot see, and potentially of that which you are unable to appreciate. Should you rule out criticism completely? No, just believe in yourself and you will know what to do with it. It is an unfortunate thing not to listen to your instincts and your wondrous sub-conscious mind.

Samantha K

xx