Generally, when we think of flirting, we think of seduction in the eyes. We think of witty banter and suggestive conversation. We think of that touchy feely excitement where the nerve receptors in our body feel and crave every little touch.
Flirting without words can sometimes be the most thrilling. I love the concept of having sex through the eyes. This can either make you uncomfortable or very excited. It really depends on how comfortable that person is with their sexuality.
If you are single, this can be an extremely powerful tool to have in your back pocket and to pull out when someone catches your eye and looks keen to play along. But there are a few things you need to have before you can build this skill, a few necessary key ingredients that will help you excel.
The way you dress. This says a great deal about you, your personality and your comfort in your sexuality. For a female, the most important thing when it come to dress code is to give off a feminine energy. It is like a drug to men and they pick up the scent quicker than you give them credit for. To a man, a confident female with a delicate female energy tickles his imagination of a confident woman in bed who carries through that feminine energy and will ruthlessly drop the lady-like approach and unleash her womanly desires upon him. To uphold her appearance translates to a man, commitment and respect to herself, as well as a pride and confidence in herself. Studies show, that men are only physically stimulated by women who flash a bit of skin and wear their sexuality on the sleeve. However, men are stimulated on a higher level when physically and mentally stimulated by leaving more to the imagination and playing the game of flirting makes it more interesting for them.
For a male, the most important element to your dress code is to be clean. Clean, crisp and oozing masculinity. Every women wants a man to take control (why do you think all the erotic novels are such a big hit?), so you need to dress the part. Take tips from what works. You don’t have to look like George Clooney or Brad Pitt... just implement the common denominator - Dream Guy Class!
The way you speak. Manners, allocution and etiquette can unfortunately be far and in between, hence the obvious impact of impressing the opposite sex. Nothing is as refreshing as a well-mannered individual that looks at you in the eye when introducing themselves or celebrating a “cheers” of beverages, knowing how to hold a conversation and understands the respect of the 21st Century values in social dynamics. There is no need to be the 1950’s casanova who stands every time a woman does and waiting to push in her chair when it is obvious there is no need. As with everything, judgement and moderation is crucial. One exercise I like to do with my clients is when having conversations, especially if they are a corporate function, or meeting the parents where the pressure to impress may be a little higher, imagine there is a baby or children in the room and speak accordingly. It is amazing how we become better people in the presents of children and we how alert we are to speak delicately and in a positive fashion.
Samantha K
xx
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